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After what could be referred to as one of the roughest and most transitional years of her life, Rihanna, is re-emerging from her silence and speaking out in candid interviews. This week she will appear on ABC twice (Good Morning America and 20/20) and will be honored as one of  Glamour Magazine’s Women of the Year at a ceremony in NYC next week (Nov. 9). Rihanna will be featured in Glamour Mag December issue, in it she talks about her career (past, present, and future), fashion, and of course her pivotal moment this year the “incident” with ex-boyfriend Chris Brown. 

Here’s a peek at the interview:

On Auditioning for Jay-Z

Glamour: You auditioned for Jay-Z at Def Jam. What was that like?

Rihanna: I was nervous as hell. The night before, I couldn’t sleep. I was trying on a million different outfits and makeup. I remember seeing Jay-Z and starting to shake. I thought he would be in a suit, sitting behind a desk with a cigar. But he was totally chill, wearing sneakers and a T-shirt. Then I went into audition mode. I knew it was all or nothing. Right away, the Def Jam people said, “You can’t leave the building.” They closed the door, and the lawyers stayed until 1:00 or 2:00 A.M. to do the deal. In a matter of weeks, the first single [“Pon de Replay”] went to radio. Then we shot a video, and the song just took off. I was in the Top 10 with huge artists who I looked up to. Jay-Z kept telling me, “This never happens, so don’t get used to it.” I saw how special that moment was.

On The “Incident”

Glamour: Let’s talk about this past year—you’ve obviously been through some difficult things. How did the people around you help you cope?

Rihanna: My friends and family have been extremely supportive, and everyone has been there for me. But at some point you are there alone. It’s a lonely place to be—no one can understand. That’s when you get close to God.

Glamour: Are you referring to the [Chris Brown] incident?

Rihanna: I am talking about starting with the night [before] the Grammys and then on. That was not the only thing that occurred this year. The picture leaking…it was one thing after another.

Glamour: You’re talking about the photo [reportedly of Rihanna’s injured face taken by police after Brown assaulted her] that was allegedly leaked by cops. You handled that so well; you kept silent in the press.

Rihanna: It was humiliating; that is not a photo you would show to anybody. I felt completely taken advantage of. I felt like people were making it into a fun topic on the Internet, and it’s my life. I was disappointed, especially when I found out the photo was [supposedly leaked by] two women.

Glamour: Do you feel that this experience has laid the groundwork for coping with anything so public again?

Rihanna: It has taught me so much. I felt like I went to sleep as Rihanna and woke up as Britney Spears. That was the level of media chaos that happened the next day. It was like, What, there are helicopters circling my house? There are 100 people in my cul-de-sac? What do you mean, I can’t go back home?

Glamour: If you could offer a message to the millions of young women who look up to you, what would you tell someone who found herself in a similar situation?

Rihanna: Domestic violence is a big secret. No kid goes around and lets people know their parents fight. Teenage girls can’t tell their parents that their boyfriend beat them up. You don’t dare let your neighbor know that you fight. It’s one of the things we [women] will hide, because it’s embarrassing. My story was broadcast all over the world for people to see, and they have followed every step of my recovery. The positive thing that has come out of my situation is that people can learn from that. I want to give as much insight as I can to young women, because I feel like I represent a voice that really isn’t heard. Now I can help speak for those women.

On Future Plans

Rihanna: So much has happened in the past five years, I can’t speak for the next five. What I want is to continue to grow. Because I am never satisfied; I always want more. I always want to get better. I always want to climb another step.

Glamour: Is it too early for you to think, I want to be in love, I want to have a family? Is that too far down the road?

Rihanna: I hope I find love in the next 10 years—that will be pretty annoying if I am 31 and still have never been in love! But yeah, I’d like to be in a great place in both my personal life and my career. I still want to be doing what I love. Whatever that is in 10 years, I don’t know.

The December issue of Glamour hits newstands Nov. 10.